net127

The Paradox of Our Age

We have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; widerfreeways, but narrower viewpoints; we spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy it less.

We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time; we have more degrees, but less common sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.

We spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk too much, love too seldom and lie too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life; we've added years to life, not life to years.

We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.

We've conquered outer space, but not inner space; we've done larger things, but not better things; we've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; we've split the atom, but not our prejudice; we write more, but learn less; plan more, but accomplish less.

We've learned to rush, but not to wait; we have higher incomes; but lower morals; more food but less appeasement; more acquaintances, but fewer friends; more effort but less success.

We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication; we've become long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are the time of fast foods and slow digestion; tall men and short character; steep profits, and shallow relationships.

These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure and less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition.

These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes.

These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.

It is a time when there is much in the show window, and nothing in the stockroom.

Indeed it's all true.

Think about it...read it again.

--Author Unknown

The Ten Commandments of E-mail

The Ten Commandments of E-mail:
- Thou shalt include a clear and specific subjectline.
- Thou shalt edit any quoted text down to the minimum thou needest.
- Thou shalt read thine own message thrice before thou sendest it.
- Thou shalt ponder how thy recipient might react to thy message.
- Thou shalt check thy spelling and thy grammar.
- Thou shalt not curse, flame, spam or USE ALL CAPS.
- Thou shalt not forward any chain letter (Am I guilty...).
- Thou shalt not use e-mail for any illegal or unethical purpose.
- Thou shalt not rely on the privacy of e-mail, especially from work.
- When in doubt, save thy message overnight and reread it in the light
of the dawn.

And, here's the "Golden Rule" of e-mail:
- That which thou findest hateful to receive, sendest thou not unto
others.

I want to be six again.

I want to be six again.

I want to go to McDonald's and think it's the best place in
the world to eat.

I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make
waves with rocks.

I want to think M&Ms are better than money 'cause you can eat them.

I want to play kickball during recess and stay up on
Christmas Eve waiting to hear Santa and Rudolph on the roof.

I long for the days when life was simple. When all you knew
were your colors, the addition tables, and simple nursery rhymes,
but it didn't bother you because you didn't know what you didn't
know, and you didn't care.

I want to go to school and have snack time, recess, gym,
and field trips.

I want to be happy because I don't know what should make me upset.

I want to think the world is fair, and everyone in it is
honest and good.

I want to believe that anything is possible. Sometime, while I
was maturing, I learned too much. I learned of nuclear weapons,
starving and abused kids, and unhappy marriages.

I want to be six again.

I want to think that everyone, including myself, will live
forever because I don't know the concept of death.

I want to be oblivious to the complexity of life, and be
overly excited by the little things again.

I want television to be something I watch for fun, not something
I use for escape from the things I should be doing.

I want to live knowing the little things I find exciting will
always make me as happy as when I first learned them.

I want to be six again.

I remember not seeing the world as a whole, but rather being
aware of only the things that directly concerned me.

I want to be naive enough to think that if I'm happy, so is
everyone else.

I want to walk down the beach and think only of the sand
beneath my feet, and the possibility of finding that blue piece
of sea glass I'm looking for.

I want to spend my afternoons climbing trees and riding my
bike, letting the grownups worry about time, the dentist, and
how to find the money to fix the car.

I want to wonder what I'll do when I grow up, not worry what
I'll do if this doesn't work out.

I want that time back. I want to use it now as an escape.
So that when my computer crashes, I have a mountain of paperwork,
two depressed friends, or second thoughts about so many things,
I can travel back and build a snowman without thinking about
anything except whether the snow sticks together. What I can
possibly use for the snowman's mouth

I want to be six again

-- author unknown

YOU MIGHT BE AN AOL ADDICT IF...

You walk into a room, and finding that it has more then 23 people, you inform the management that there is an error. / You find yourself tilting your head when you smile. / Your AOL bill is more than your phone bill. / When laughing, you find yourself saying "LOL" outloud. / You get more e-mail than snail mail. From: (HAND!)
To: Recipients - HAND
Date: Mon Jul 20 08:25:53 CDT 1998
Subject: Your 'Have A Nice Day' Laugh #0817

YOU MIGHT BE AN AOL ADDICT IF...

• You walk into a room, and finding that it has more then 23 people, you inform the management that there is an error.
• You find yourself tilting your head when you smile.
• Your AOL bill is more than your phone bill.
• When laughing, you find yourself saying "LOL" outloud.
• You get more e-mail than snail mail.
• When introducing yourself to anyone, you use your screen name.
• You are no longer afraid of a mouse.
• You're awake for a lot of sunrises.
• You are a male and see a female in the "real" world that you wish to meet, your first thought is to IM her.
• You are a female and see a male in the "real" world that you wish to meet, your first thought is that you wish he would IM you.
• You don't understand the humor in the above-mentioned item, since the "real" world is not at your fingertips.
• When seeing someone you wish to meet, your second thought is wishing they would be on AOL so you wouldn't have to meet them in person.
• You go up to people you are attracted to and ask for their GIF.
• Although you don't know what they look like, you become insanely jealous of people that are hitting on your cyber-love.
• You don't even know what your cyber-love looks like.
• The only way that your child can get your attention is by:
  • Standing in front of your screen
  • IM'ing you
  • telling you that Steve Case is calling you on the phone
• When your spouse is mad at you, they threaten to erase your e-mail, and you humbly, earnestly, and quickly beg for forgiveness.
• When at work, your boss constantly reminds you that the letter "i" should be capitalized.
• When going on a job interview and asked if you have any questions about the company, your first response is to ask if they are on AOL.
• When looking at signs, you wonder why they're always yelling at you.
• When leaving to go to the bathroom, you find yourself saying, "BRB."
• When meeting a stranger, you ask for their profile. If they have none, you ask for an agesexlocation check.
• Your spouse now complains of you moving your fingers in your sleep instead of talking.
• You dream in text.
• Tech support calls YOU for help!
• You watch TV with the sound off and the close-captioning on.
• You double-click your remote.
• You beg your friends to go online so you can "hang out".
• You've gotten on a plane to meet someone face to face
• You've met over a 100 AOLers.
• You have over 100 people on your buddy list.
• You sign on and immediately get ten IMs from people that have you on their buddy lists.
• You meet people face to face, and you don't know their real names.
• You've known people for years, and you don't know their real names.
• You've typed, "Drinking on AOL is better than drinking alone."
• You have a vanity tag with your screenname on it.
• You no longer use capital letter, proper punctuation, or complete sentences.
• You type over 70 WPM.
• You type faster than you think
• Three words: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome
• When someone asks, "What did you say" You respond, "Scroll up!"
• You have an identity crisis when someone uses a screenname similar to yours.
• You change screennames so much that you have to check your profile to figure out who you are.
• You've invited ten or more strangers to your house only because they were cool online.
• You have a second line just for you computer.
• You type messages to people while you're speaking with on the phone at the same time.
• You smile sideways.
• You spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to everyone before signing off.
• You bring a bag lunch to your computer.
• You go through AOL withdrawal during dinner.
• You wake up and your first instinct is to go online before having a cup of coffee.
• You use AOL lingo in your "real" life (if you still have one)
• You stop using whole words like BRB, TTYL, dunno, gotta, etc...
• You got your psychiatrist addicted to AOL and are now undergoing therapy in private rooms instead of his/her office.
• When you die, you want your computer buried with you -- or vice versa.
• Being called a "Newbie" is a MAJOR insult.
• There's absolutely no interesting chat in any room and you are really bored -- yet you don't want to leave in case you miss something.
• You enjoy being called an AOL addict.
• You understand the humor in all of these jokes because you have committed them yourself.